Voice Talent Needed

Now that we have firmly established that "I'm right and you're wrong," I can go on to the next order of business. After this message:

Edited to say: Please stop commenting if you're trying to convince me that you can't know anything, and that nothing can be true. If you don't see your own self-refutation, I can't help you. All I can do is agree with you that you don't know anything, and are unable to speak the truth: i.e. that there is no truth. Fine with me. You don't know shit. Now. Back to reality. Which, contrary to the ignorance-promoters, exists.

As you may or may not know, I have made a series of OTR-style audio plays, many of which are based on Jack Chick tracts. One such parody is Johnny Virtue in: Dark Dungeons.

Johnny Virtue is a CPI: Christian Private Investigator. In the second installment of the adventures of Johnny Virtue, we have ventured away from the world of Jack Chick and into the world of Bibleman! This would be the first of a two-part Bibleman adventure.

For Enter The Bibleman, I am looking for someone who can do the part of Vinnie, Johnny's shady Christian sidekick. Vinnie has seen the best and the worst of The Streets.

An excerpt from the script:

VINNIE : "Vinnie."

VIRTUE : "Hey, it's me. I've got a case I need your help on. You're going to like this one."

VINNIE : "How much is the reward ?"

VIRTUE : "A possible 1.2 million."

VINNIE : "Impressive ! Who is the unlucky victim ?"

VIRTUE : "Bibleman."

VINNIE : "Not so impressive. I didn't know you specialized in suicide missions now."

VIRTUE : "Are you afraid of a bunch of costumed freaks ?"

VINNIE : "A bunch of costumed freaks wearing armour and armed to the teeth with stolen Church technology... I'm not too hot about that."

VIRTUE : "You know I wouldn't put myself in a risk I couldn't take."

VINNIE : "True."

VIRTUE : "Meet me at the corner of Lazarus and John Paul the Second."

***MUSIC: Relaxed Jazz

Anyone willing to take on this easy assignment would need only a few things:

1. Free Audacity Software
2. A mic (a computer mic will do fine)
3. a few minutes of free time
4. a relatively quiet room
5. a way to send the files to me

I would want the files a week after we confirm your involvement, at the very latest. I have all the other parts confirmed, and I want to get this thing going. Your reward: the rewarding sense of a job well-done and maybe some annoyed Christians.

Thanks a lot, and let me know either through this blog or go ahead and send me an email at alleee@hellboundalleee.com .

PS: More parodies may be found on my archives page.