Behold, the Atheist's Nightmare

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Dear Internet Diary,

Have you heard that the banana proves creationism? It's true! Listen to Ray Comfort:

Behold! The Atheist's Nightmare!

Yes, that was the one where the banana wearing a tie knocked on the doughnut's door and said "Do yo like working so hard every day? Have you heard about Amway, God's new covenant of wealth?" Terrible dream.

Now if you study a well-made banana you'll find...

What--God fucks up some of His bananas?
Actually, "God" doesn't make bananas. Man does. It's called "horticulture." A God-made banana--you wouldn't want to eat it.

The banana and the hand are perfectly made one for the others.

Actually, the glove is made for the human hand. Maybe the natural banana was made for the chimp--our cousin's--hand. The banana was made bigger, by us, because people like their fruit bigger.

You'll find the maker of the banana, Almighty God, has made it with a non-slip surface.

Can't say as much for the other side of the surface. You know another fruit that almighty God made with a non-slip surface? The Prickly Pear. Tastes like strawberries. It actually tastes better than the banana. Not exactly made to fit the human hand, eh?

You'll find a wrapper which is biodegradeable, has perforations.

Fruit skin is generally biodegradeable like that. Is your designed soda-can you were just demonstrating bio-degradeable? As far as the easy-to open thing, if the banana proves creationism, the coconut disproves it. And it doesn't easily fit...

Notice how gracefully it sits over the human hand. Notice it has a point at the top for ease of entry, it's just the right shape for the human mouth

I saw how you looked at Kirk Cameron when you said that. You old dog, you.

So lets sing the praises of artificial selection: that people tend to select toward the traits that people want. Because, if you ever had to try and live on so-called "god-made" fruits and vegetables, you'd have to wonder about how much this God person knows about his own children.