Friday, March 17, 2006

Come to The Netherlands, All Ye Amish

Dear Internet Diary,

I read an article today about a new immigration policy in The Netherlands. Part of the test requires immigrants to watch a film showing gay men kissing and bare-breasted women. The intent seems to be to educate immigrants that Dutch culture is liberal, and that they have to accept that to live in the country. It doesn't say you have to agree with those things--you just have to buy and watch the film.

So far, so good.

However, according to the article, not only is the Iranian version edited and censored, but Americans are exempt.

Do the Dutch have illusions about what Americans are like? Have they not heard about the national fury over the wardrobe malfunction of Janet Jackson? Do they know about the "War on Drugs" and the FCC with its bogus standards of decency? Have they never heard of Pat Robertson, TBN, or the Republican Party? Has the immigration minister ever heard of someone called George W Bush?

They might need to rethink their American exemption. Better think about the Canadian exemption too.

But I'll have to pas on this one. I know that fundamentalists are making life in Holland harder, but I don't think more government regulations will help much. After all, if the Netherlands didn't have a government, Muslims couldn't affect its policies, could they? Sorry, Sharia.

The Netherlands doesn't exist in a vacuum. That's like saying the state of Washington isn't affected by Oregon, Idaho, or California. But I can't blame them. The film reminds me of a travel brochure, more than immigration policy. Instead of advertising their tolerance for other religions, they should advertise what people really go to the Netherlands for: drugs, prostitution, windmills and Anne Frank. Get all of that on some posters, and you'll get the immigrants you really want, Holland.

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Oh, and the whole St Patrick's Day thing. How did YOU contribute to being Irish, and are you really a Catholic? And what's so bad about snakes?

4 comments:

Marek said...

If we go to Netherlands together, can we hold hands and skip?!

Speaking of snakes... Aside from my computer technician...ing. I'm also a magician, and I just got a book called stars of magic, that's not the point, but there is aparently a magic book that teaches you magic tricks to help teach the "teachings" of the bible! Can you believe that?! That's the biggest load of crap I have ever heard, no wonder kids these days are so screwed in the head they think that god makes a knot come out of rope...

Hellbound Alleee said...

That's awesome! "Stars of Magic," eh? I'll have to look that up.

It reminds me of Bobby Hill at his Sunday School with his "Amazing Jesus" routine. Also, it reminds me about what Penn said about magicians--what they appear to be doing...they can't really do. So there you go. The Amazing Jesus is just doing tricks.

You ever wonder where the irony switch is on these people?

Marek said...

If you like I can scan the ad for you, it's pretty rediculous.

Aaron Kinney said...

But why the hell did they censor the Iranian version?