Friday, September 01, 2006

Hellfire and Damnation--in a kicky, flirty new style, JUST FOR GIRLS!

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Dial The Truth Ministries
(a fundie site, of course, just to make it clear), reports on a kicky new bible:

The first to crawl out of the "fashion" pile is the Revolve Bible. The Revolve Bible is aimed directly at the young teenage Christian girl. It is published by Thomas Nelson Publishers under Transit Books ( says of it’s new creation, "It's the complete New Testament, but it looks just like a fashion magazine!" and a little P.$. "Order your copy today at!" A "boy" version of the Revolve is also in the works. Zondervan reportedly, also has "fashion-bibles" on the way. (did I hear ca$h-ching?)

And yes. . . The Revolve "Bible" does indeed, look, feel and read just like a teenage "fashion" magazine. As the saying goes, "If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck – it’s probably a duck." An updated Bible PERversion translation says, "If it looks like a fashion magazine, feels like a fashion magazine, and reads like a fashion magazine – it’s probably a new Bible PERversion".
Don't forget to check out the "Guys Speak Out" section, for typical teen magazine wisdom:
Q: How long should you date before you say "I love you?"
A: I would say that when all you can do is think about that person, and you know them really, really well, then you can say "I love you."
(Revolve, p. 67)
I hope this mag gives out good christian tips, like sharing your husband with 12 other pre-teen girls.

1 comment:

Mark Plus said...

Will this magazine tell teen girls what to do during their monthly period of "uncleanness"?