Friday, January 12, 2007

"Do I Have That Right?" A neat email in my inbox, and my response:

I don't know if Melisa is a Christian, or a witty, appreciative atheist, or something else, but I thought I'd publish her email, and my response:

So you at one point worked for Jesus and now u on on the devils team? (I
was reading some of your things. Well more then some i have been on here for
about 40 min. lol) anyway do i have that right?

Well, the thing is, Melissa, Jesus never paid me back for my time. He's a lousy son of a bitch, that Jesus. So, I figured, what the hell, why not goto the other team? I mean, it has more honour in it. Think about it. God, almighty, vs any other team, is not really a "match," is it? It's much, much worse than, say, an after-school softball game with disabled girls with cancer against the New York Yankees. On steroids. Basically, what I'm saying is, it's not a fair fight! So, I boldly stand, we few, we happy few, with "the devil" against an all-powerful tyrant who already killed all the babies and puppies and everything else on earth because He goofed. It makes me better than Jesus. But then, I'd be better than that murderous bastard if I laid down before him and cried out for mercy, which is what happened with everyone the first time he killed. So, yeah, "u" have that right. I'm on the "Devil's" team.

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