Friday, December 03, 2010

Mondo Diablo Episode 285: The Boar's Head



This week, the BBC shares information about Boar's Heads and Yule logs, which is all incredibly interesting. But I would like to share some information about the Stallo, the Metal Man, who is another in my growing list of Annual Gift-Giving Men other than Saint Nicholas.

You can read the original article here.

http://www.laweekly.com/2002-12-26/news/santa-is-a-wildman/

And yes, it was a story in the Fortean Times.

The Saami await a Yuletide visit from a giant, horned and hairy wildman named Stallo. In Lappish, stallo means "metal man." Sometimes Stallo is dressed in stylish, all-black clothes like an MIB (man in black) or in a metallic suit (as conspiracy theorists conjecture, a robot or ancient astronaut in a space suit). Most likely the metal suit was the chain-mail armor of the berserker Vikings. The amoral Stallo delights in macabre acts of genital mutilation of his innocent victims. (Stallo pokes his staff up the skirts of young girls.) On Christmas Eve, Stallo rides around in his sleigh looking for something to drink. Traditionally, the Saami drive a stake into the ground near a fresh-water supply so Stallo can tie up his sled while having a refreshing gulp of water. If Stallo cannot find anything to drink, he will bash in a child's skull, sucking out the brains and blood to satiate his thirst. The most dangerous night for Lapp children is Christmas Eve, when Stallo lurks about looking for naughty victims to cram into his sack.

Playlist

Worst Jobs 11
Alleee 1
Ferrante and Teicher * Good King Wenceslaus
Steeleye Span * The Boar's Head Carol
Worst Jobs 12
Eddie Dunstedter * Silver Bells
Glossies * Glossy Christmas
Worst Jobs 13
Big Tiny Little * Santa Claus is Comin' to Town
Housewives on Prozac * I Broke my Arm Christmas Shopping at the Mall
Worst Jobs 14
The Soulful Strings * Sleigh Ride
Sinai Mountain Boys * O Hanukkah
Worst Jobs 15
Caiola & Ortolani * Bossa Nova Noel
Puffy Umiyami * RGW
Worst Jobs 16
Hollyridge Strings * Jingle Bells
Harry E. Humphrey * A Visit With Saint Nicholas (1914)
Worst Jobs 17
American Symphony Orchestra * March of the Toys/Babes in Toyland (1917 Edison Cylinder)
Tim Minchin * White Wine in the Sun
Worst Jobs 18
Andre Kostelanetz * Sleigh Ride
Y Love and Jules Brooks * Dreidel
Worst Jobs 19
Edison Concert Band * Bells of Christmas
Joel Hallikainen * Talven Ihmemaa
Worst Jobs 20
Alleee 2



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